Not so fast, Cupid!

| 13/02/2023 | 8 Comments

Bob Nickoles writes: Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and I couldn’t help but wonder if Cupid needs a little help. Help in the form of asking the diaper-wearing cherub to hold off on the arrows until we find love in ourselves first. How can anyone expect to find love and happiness in a relationship when they cannot appreciate and love who they are as a person?

Why do so many people these days hope to be made whole by someone else? I would argue that needing to be loved by someone to feel secure and happy is a recipe for a relationship imbalance, if not heartbreak.

If memory serves, Cupid carried two sets of arrows in his quiver… one for love (desire) and the other for dislike (aversion). I can’t help but feel that so many among us are wounded by our own arrows of self-hatred, wounds we hope to heal by having others LOVE US because we can’t or won’t love ourselves.

There isn’t a human being on this planet who doesn’t have regrets or can’t find flaws in their character. We are imperfect humans, after all, and the ability to forgive ourselves and others promotes understanding and personal growth. You simply can’t expect others to doctor the wounds that only you can heal. Naturally, healing oneself isn’t easy, especially when you can just swipe right and hope that someone’s love or lust will make everything okay.

There are hundreds of dating sites, and social media has made finding connections ubiquitous. However, what’s the point if you are struggling to love and accept yourself? The healing process requires courage and forgiveness. Most of us will need the help of others to heal, but it is a very personal journey.

So, I’d like to offer Cupid a little help as Valentine’s Day rapidly approaches. I know, I know! A winged infant god needing the help of a human? Regardless, I will ask my winged friend to limit the arrows this year to those who are seeking love for love’s sake and to avoid those seeking love to be made whole.

I know this isn’t entirely fair and that my help may only exacerbate our complicated interpretations of love, and if that is the case, you can always ignore my advice and just swipe right.

Happy Valentine’s!


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Comments (8)

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  1. Anonymous says:

    I just read this and it spoke to me so strongly. My husband and I are not sure what the future holds for our marriage. We’ve been together 20 years and married 10 this year.

    We both love each other but sometimes love isn’t the fix all it is made out to be.

    Thank you for taking the time to share such a thoughtful and insightful post. I love my husband, but I can’t love him the way I want to until I can love and accept myself for who I am.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I’m full of loathe & abhorrence Bob, – I had hope and admiration for PACT with their platform before election, anything you can suggest I do about that ?

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    • No PACT says:

      PACT did not exist before the election and had no platform or common manifesto.That is why they are the mess rhat they are. And we are paying for it.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Gibberish.

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  4. Anonymous says:

    Very funny, and as the article says, we need to learn to love ourselves and not expect somebody else to do that for us.
    Of course it’s good to be loved too 💗

  5. Anonymous says:

    Love has intentionally been made a complicated subject. It is very simple, it is not lust and instead of saying love yourself, say don’t hate yourself. Loving yourself creates selfishness. Not hating yourself creates forgiveness. When you meet someone who has qualities you admire and desire and it is reciprocated, then the seed of love can grow.

  6. Anonymous says:

    It behooves me to admit that Cayman Cupid does need a makeover. I put forward that Big Mac Daddy McKeeva should be the 2023 Cayman Cupid. A parade with Mac Cupid on a float would erect a new era of passion and acceptance in the community.
    I say here here to this glorious occasion And if the Big Mac behooves himself to wear the diaper only with a bow and arrow I for one would see Valentines Day spirit to a new level!

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