We all know someone who is experiencing violence

| 28/02/2020 | 34 Comments

Cayman Islands Crisis Centre Board of Directors: Last weekend’s situation at Coral Beach has attracted a great deal of attention on social media. As the Cayman Islands’ only women’s shelter, we are committed to combating any form of violence, especially to the most vulnerable amongst us. We share the concerns expressed by the community, especially as this is a violent act against a woman.

We welcome the open dialogue and understand the outrage that any act of violence against another person should evoke. The Cayman Islands, as every society in the world, has issues with violence. We are inundated by images of violence through entertainment, news and social media. Sometimes, it is fair to say, we have become anesthetised to it.

But the truth is, violence happens in hundreds, or perhaps even thousands of homes across these islands every year, in addition to incidents outside the home. Global estimates published by WHO indicate that about 1 in 3 (35%) of women worldwide have experienced either physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence or non-partner sexual violence in their lifetime.

Here in Cayman, the RCIPS responded to 2,218 domestic violence-related calls and 747 calls related to child protection in 2018. There is no way of knowing how many other assaults took place that were not reported.

And when a situation like this happens, involving a public figure in a public place, the violence issue, way too long on the back burner, is brought into sharp relief. Perhaps this is what Malcolm Gladwell would call ‘the tipping point’.

While we abhor violence against anyone and work every day with people who have been victimised by those they love and trust we also recognise that there may be a silver lining in this particular incident in that if we can get more people working, in whatever small way they can, towards eliminating gender-based violence, anger, hatred and even ‘locker room talk’ from our society, then all is not is lost.

We encourage you to take the outrage you feel at this situation and channel it for good. Please visit our website at cicc.ky to see how you can get involved. With the high demand for our services, we are raising funds to build a bigger, purpose-built home of healing, that will accommodate both female and male victims of domestic violence. We have programs like the TAYA Lounge, where we focus on providing support and counselling to at-risk kids who have witnessed and experienced things you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy.

We are showing them a different life and they are seeing what healthy relationships look like. We are in schools and workplaces, delivering training on how to keep people, young and old, safe. We run a drop-in clinic for those who experience domestic violence but might not be ready for emergency shelter, or who have transitioned to a life free from violence and need ongoing support.

To keep these programmes running and to build a new facility, we need funds. Think of donating to the Cayman Islands Crisis Centre in the name of that hard-to-buy-for person in your life, or when you are determining your corporate social responsibility strategy for the year. Our vision is that we might close our doors forever because our services are no longer required, and it will take this whole community to make that happen. We will not accomplish it on our own.

We also must remember that violence is a learned behavior. Perpetrators are solely responsible for their actions. Should they want to change and reform, the most important step is for them to acknowledge their abusive behaviours, be accountable for themselves and take responsibility for their actions. There are lots of ways to do this, for example reaching out to the Counseling Centre and/or the Department of Community Rehabilitation which provides rehabilitative services to adult offenders.

We encourage the survivor of last weekend’s attack to call us if she needs anything at all – someone to talk to, or to just sit with people who have been there and understand. We encourage everyone to do the same for the person they know or suspect is being abused, whether physically, emotionally or financially, and support them as they make some of the hardest decisions they will ever make.

It is okay to feel the outrage. We simply implore you to put that energy to good use.

#sheissupported


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Comments (34)

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  1. Anonymous says:

    Thousand of perpetrators of this violence are Caymanian. Hundreds of the perpetrators are expatriates. The Caymanians should be arrested and prosecuted. The expatriates should be arrested and prosecuted and removed from the jurisdiction. Why are they not?

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  2. Anonymous says:

    Pretty standard order at a local bar…

    Waitress “What would you like to drink sir?”
    Male Patron “Gimme some o that P**** Juice, or maybe some o that T**** Milk.

    Been tolerated for years, perhaps this will finally be the beginning to the end of workplace harassment.

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    • Anonymous says:

      You totally gloss over the harrassment that males also suffer in the workplace at the hands of female aggressors.

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    • Anonymous says:

      I was constantly harassed at work, a government job, by my superior. It freaked me out. Told the manager who assured me it was the culture of the workplace. I had to quit a very good paying job.

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    • Anonymous says:

      “Want to see my black mamba?”

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    • Anonymous says:

      Very true. I routinely had male patrons (and managers of the bars/restaurants!) touch me in a sexual manner or say similar sexually inappropriate things. And I couldn’t speak up for fear of losing my job, since service industry workers are treated like expendable trash.

  3. Anonymous says:

    The root of most of these problems is religeon.
    If you believe a woman was made from a rib of the first male, then you have created a good base for inequality..
    Most religeons are dominated by men. God is referred to as he, jesus was male. Women are to serve men.

    Goodluck with fixing the problem, i just gave the solution. Eliminate religeon from your society.

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    • Anonymous says:

      Judaism says Eve came from Adam’s rib, meaning his side to denote she is his equal – not from his head nor foot bottom. So, I don’t know where you are getting the interpretation that rib means below. It doesn’t in Judaism. You must have got that view from a Christian perspective. Most the time, they are wrong about the Jewish Bible.

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    • Anonymous says:

      More like ignorance and illiteracy.

  4. Anonymous says:

    What about the worst violence of all from the despots in government. We are assaulted with lies, over-regulation, laziness in the public sector, super-high cost of living, incompetence, out of control immigration and they have the cheek to look around for those to blame.

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  5. Anonymous says:

    The headline that we all know someone who is experiencing violence is absolutely correct and I proclaim vehemently that violence against anyone is wrong. The incident that happened last week while horrifying does not readily address the issue that plagues us in the Cayman Islands. The focus is on domestic violence/violence against women but this issue goes far beyond that.We have children, seniors that are abused daily and even the males that are also abused in the relationships that they are in and yet there is no focus on these incidents when they happen…why? I was witness to a domestic report to the RCIP of a male reporting a domestic issue/incident where he chose not to react to his female partner physically abusing (stabbing him in the back, arms and side with a sharp object that left serious injuries requiring a trip to the Emergency) but chose to go to the central police station and report the matter. Guess what happened?? The Officers laughed at him and said “you make her do this to you? You deserved to be stabbed.” I was taken back and I made a report the following day of the incident that I had witnessed.

    We must not condone violence perpetrated against women, children or anyone for that matter. Violence, especially domestic violence against our most vulnerable must be dealt with swiftly and to the fullest extent that the law allows.

    #sheissupported
    #notoabuse
    #notodomesticviolence

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    • Anonymous says:

      This has to do with the Family, such as, men, women, elders, and children – everyone. THIS IS NOT JUST ABOUT FEMALES and it shouldn’t be just about females.

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      • Anonymous says:

        Of course it is not just about Females, but in this situation the victim is female and in most cases the victim is female. Women live in fear every day. They have to carry mace, take self defense classes. They have to be careful of what they wear, don’t wear.

        I completely agree, violence is all encompassing, but we need to lift women up right now and ensure that there is no violence in our society against anyone. Full stop.

        Because we are focusing on females in this instance does not mean that we do not see a larger issue at hand, but right now the focus is on her. #sheisupported

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    • Anonymous says:

      So true. The Caribbean and Central American male look down on men that act responsibly toward “reverse domestic violence”. Women abuse emotionally and mentally too.

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  6. Anonymous says:

    Mckeeva already said he is going to get help. Leave the man alone and let those who are without sin cast the first stone.

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    • Anonymous says:

      Yep sounds like Mr. McKeeva – go out partying one night and next day leading the song service at church. 3:08PM we the public expect better out of our elected representatives. Mr. McKeeva should consider full retirement – spend time with your wife, church and grandchildren.
      Really wish you the best with the stop drinking part – so resign your post and concentrate on being a better family man and a better example.

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    • Anonymous says:

      And talk about a hypocrite!!! Big up and make show in Church for all to see and doing what he is doing out in the public. Mr. McKeeva the pulpit not made for the wolf in sheeps clothing, so step down from that at the same time.

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    • Anonymous says:

      He has only said he is going to get help due to the recent public display of his proclivity to hurt women….only upon threat to his position. Anyone whose apology is an excuse doesn’t really see a problem.

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    • Anonymous says:

      He’s been a bully for years and doesn’t deserve our forgiveness.

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    • Anonymous says:

      Well if he was casting the first stone it would probably hit a woman.

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    • Say it like it is says:

      By your standards McKeeva would be the last person in Cayman to cast a stone.

  7. Anonymous says:

    It seems that Mr. Mckeeva is untouchable – didn’t he have a similar incident at a Florida casino just a few short years ago? Whatever happened in that case?
    Why hasn’t he been arrested and formally charged?

    Mr. Mckeeva I got a message for you. You see Sir, you have done a lot of questionable things over the years and have always managed to get yourself free and clear of the situation.

    One day Sir you will meet your Maker (and I not talking about the Lodge variety) – none of us left here in Cayman can possibly know your final destination, but am presuming that a good cold beer wont be found there! You sir are a poor example to your family and you know it.

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    • Anonymous says:

      He was arrested with a mug shot!

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      • Anonymous says:

        And what was the outcome of the Florida case? Did he pay a fine? Did he make an out of court settlement with the casino worker?

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        • Anonymous says:

          really you f….king idiot? The outcome was the cctv didn’t have an angle to support the poor groped woman’s claim.

        • Anonymous says:

          The Florida incident according to reports was inappropriate groping of a young lady’s behind. Passed it off as “cultural differences” and somehow got off. Makes no sense. Makes a bad impression on us.

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    • Anonymous says:

      Don’t call him Sir. He does not deserve it.

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  8. Anonymous says:

    It is really sad that in our society, a week can go by and neither the Speaker of the House will do the right thing and resign nor will the Unity Government simply let the public know that it has unanimous support of the Legislative Assembly for a No Confidence vote and remove the Speaker from the position.

    This certainly speaks to the morals/ethics of the Unity Government – shame on you for supporting a 65-year old man who goes out on a drinking spree, acts like a total fool and doesn’t remember a thing – again really sad that someone can maintain a position held in high regard and not uphold the standards that is expected of someone in that type of position.

    Mr. Speaker, get over yourself, resign, seek counselling and quit acting like a fool.

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